Sunday, July 22, 2012

Calm before the storm

Laying down after my final weekend before I start treatment on Monday. Nothing spectacular to report but grateful for the time I got to spend with family friends, especially my wife and two kids (Ben and Emma) this weekend.

It’s going to be hard not seeing my kids as much as I go through this. It’s unfair to ask my wife to try to take care of me and two kids under 3 so they will be spending a lot of time at my in-laws.

Dropping them off tonight was tough. We have dropped them off to stay the night before, but for some reason this time was different. I held my two-month old daughter before we left and I knew I have to beat this and be strong for her and Ben.

While I wish I didn’t have to go through this at all, I’m grateful my kids are too young to see what is going on. It’s going to be much easier on them.

I also wanted to thank everyone for their support of my first post. I heard from friends I had not talked to in years. Some were even cancer survivors or had people close to them beat cancer. I appreciate everyone that reached out to me and took the time to read my first post.

I’ve had a lot of anxiety this weekend, but I’m also eager to get started and get closer to the end. I hope to check in and report after tomorrow.

I just wanted to leave with a little video of one of my favorite speeches. It’s a speech by Al Pacino’s character in Any Given Sunday (if you watch skip to about 1:40). It’s a great speech and can somewhat apply to my situation. He talks about being willing to fight for every inch. I know my cancer is less than an inch right now, but I’m willing to fight for it. As Pacino says, “I’m willing to fight and die for that inch.”

Thanks for reading.

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